Setting the Scene
Last week, David was on a high note. He listened to Abigail's wisdom, turned from his impulsive path, and looked like the kind of king you'd want to follow — grateful, self-controlled, reasonable.
But as is so often the case, on the heels of spiritual victory, disappointment was just around the corner. David was already a married man. But he saw in Abigail what he wanted — and he took her.
The narrator doesn't step in and say, "This was wrong." There's no neat moral conclusion. But if we get the rest of the story, we'll see this wasn't just a footnote — it was a turning point in the wrong direction.
The Passage: 1 Samuel 25:39b–44
"Then David sent and spoke to Abigail, to take her as his wife. When the servants of David came to Abigail at Carmel, they said to her, 'David has sent us to you to take you to him as his wife.' And she rose and bowed with her face to the ground and said, 'Behold, your handmaid is a servant to wash the feet of the servants of my lord.' And Abigail hurried and rose and mounted a donkey, and her five young women attended her. She followed the messengers of David and became his wife. David also took Ahinoam of Jezreel, and both of them became his wives. Saul had given Michal his daughter, David's wife, to Palti the son of Laish, who was of Gallim."— 1 Samuel 25:39b–44 (ESV)
David Sends for Abigail (vv. 39b–40)
Why Abigail?
She was beautiful, discerning, and now very wealthy. David owed her a debt of gratitude for preventing him from acting like a fool. How could he not be attracted to her?
The Word "Take"
David sent to take her as his wife. This word is significant — it's exactly what the prophet Samuel warned God's people that kings would do.
"He will take your daughters… He will take the best of your fields…"
— 1 Samuel 8:16–17
At first glance this looks like a beautiful resolution. But if we slow down, there's more going on than meets the eye.
Abigail's Response (vv. 41–42)
Without hesitation, Abigail humbled herself again — offering to become a servant, even willing to wash the feet of David's servants. It was a purely symbolic gesture of deep contrition; she fully anticipated David would honor his offer.
Eager, Not Just Willing
Abigail hurried and rose. She was not merely compliant — she was eager. David had demonstrated himself to be a godly, reasonable man, a stark contrast to Nabal.
Pragmatic Reality
Nabal was wealthy, but Abigail remained childless. Childless widows — wealthy or not — were vulnerable in many ways. Her consent may have been as much pragmatic as romantic.
Power & Influence
For his part, David saw not only a beautiful, discerning woman — he also saw an opportunity to secure power and influence in the region by gaining Nabal's significant wealth. (cf. 2 Samuel 12:8)
The Uncomfortable Truth (vv. 43–44)
Here is where the story refuses to wrap up neatly. David also took Ahinoam of Jezreel, and both of them became his wives. Commentators Longman and Garland note that Ahinoam was almost certainly married before Abigail, since she is always listed first when the two names appear together. (cf. 1 Samuel 27:3; 30:5; 2 Samuel 2:2)
Godly leaders demonstrate restraint, wisdom, and humility one moment — only to disappoint us the next. Rarely is life wrapped up neatly. The Old Testament doesn't offer a children's moral story; it calls the reader to consider the outcome of the characters' actions.
Meanwhile, Saul had given Michal, David's wife, to Palti the son of Laish. The family fractures are already beginning.
Was This Sin?
How do we account for David — a man after God's own heart — taking multiple wives? Three possibilities exist:
1
Ignorance
The Law may have been sealed up; Samuel was dead. David had no spiritual father to guide him.
2
Kinsman Redeemer
David may have been fulfilling a duty as nearest relative to a childless widow.
3
Sin
Straight-up, pragmatic or lustful sin — the option most scholars, and the trajectory of David's life, support.
Peter Leithart writes: "In the flush of this great deliverance, David sinned by taking another wife. Contrary to the law, David was beginning to multiply wives, and by the time he became king in Hebron, he had six sons, each of which had a different mother." (2 Samuel 3:2–5)
The Consequences Across Generations
David's lust problem didn't stay with David. What was tolerated in one generation was magnified in the next. That's a strong warning for parents.
Amnon
Raped his sister Tamar
Absalom
Took David's harem publicly on the roof
Solomon
700 wives and 300 concubines
The Kingdom
Eventually tore in two
Rather than raising his children in the fear of the Lord and producing a godly heir, David gave in to lust and made pragmatic decisions that destroyed not only his family but the entire nation. This very decision may well have been the downfall of Israel as a unified nation.
God's Design for Marriage
"Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh."
— Genesis 2:24
God ordained marriage before any other institution. Adam had 12 pairs of ribs — God could have fashioned multiple wives. From a pragmatic standpoint, that would have been more efficient. But God chose to make for Adam one wife. A helper suitable for him. The mandate: the two shall become one flesh.
Procreation
"Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth…" (Genesis 1:28) — to produce image-bearers, raise them in the fear of the Lord, and send them as salt and light.
Proclamation
Ultimately, marriage is about proclaiming the gospel. Paul writes: "This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church." (Ephesians 5:32) The union of husband and wife points to the union of Christ and His Church.
David: Example and Warning
Every character of the Bible is either a precursor or an object lesson, an example or a warning. In the case of David, often both — and sometimes with barely any space between.
Last Week: The Example
David listened to wisdom, showed restraint, and demonstrated the kind of king worth following.
This Week: The Warning
David stepped out of God's created order, and the consequences echoed across generations and tore a nation in two.
When God's design for marriage is stretched or ignored, it produces conflict, division, and devastation in the next generation. The Bible doesn't always stop and say, "This was sin." But it doesn't need to. God lets the consequences speak.
The King Who Will Never Fail Us
What began in the paradise of Eden in Genesis 2 finds its culmination in the paradise of heaven in Revelation 21 — another wedding. Christ, the Bridegroom, and His bride the Church, united at last and forever.
Divine Restraint
He never had to be talked down. No Abigail was needed to prevent Him from sin.
Divine Wisdom
No one was ever sent to give Him wisdom. He is wisdom itself.
Divine Commitment
He gave Himself up for His one bride, the Church — washing her in the Word, preparing a place for her, and one day calling her to Himself.
He is THE faithful Shepherd King of whom David was merely a dim shadow. Every victorious leader in the Bible points to the victory of Jesus over sin, death, and the grave. Every leader who falls is a reminder that no human king is sufficient — we need a perfect King.
Do You Know This King?
The question we ought to be asking isn't so much about David — but about you.
Do you know His love? Do you know His grace? Do you know His holiness? Does His righteousness clothe you?
Does His rod and staff comfort you? Do you hear His voice and follow Him? Do you find rest in Him?
Do you come to Him thirsty and find the water of life? Do you take shelter in His wings? Do you love Him — and if you love Him, do you obey Him?
"…for He who is in you is greater than He who is in the world." — 1 John 4:4 — Brother and sister, if the answer to any of these is 'no,' or 'not sure,' today would be a beautiful day to turn that to a resounding yes.
Come to the Table
He not only left us His Spirit — who seals us for heaven and reminds us who we are and whose we are — He also left us a reminder to feel and taste, to smell and see. A symbol of His self-sacrificing love. We call it communion.
No matter where you are today — whether you relate more to David this week than last week, whether you're broken down or beaten up, tired, frustrated, scared, or angry — Jesus, the King who will never fail you, invites you to remember what He's done.
He will never leave you nor forsake you.
Receive His grace with joy, by faith.